As I am sure that most of you have figured out (those of you who can count), that time has come. Josh and I are down to our last 5 days together; our very last weekend for 7 + months. my squadron it working tomorrow - oh joy. But, I am not going to complain or whine. And I'm going to try really hard to go thru the weekend w/o crying; I want our last couple of days to be happy ones, not sad ones. I won't lie tho, it seems like all I ever really wanna do anymore is just burst into tears at the mere thought of him leaving me, even tho I know that he will be back in 7 months. Sometimes when I think about it, I just want to throw up. I rarely really feel like eating, but, I do it because I don't want ppl to ask me questions, because then I will just cry! I'm afraid that maybe I am pulling away from Josh, because maybe then it won't hurt. The Chaplain explained something to us at Josh's squadron picnic - he said this: first, your gonna be angry because they're leaving or @ whatever is taking them away from you; then you will be in denial of them leaving at all; then you'll draw away from them, to try and cushion the blow. I remember when he said all this, I was like "whatever." I said that would never happen to us. But, now that I think back, he's right. And now all I wanna do is cry...
But, I don't want anyone to feel sorry for either of us; instead I would ask one thing from you. Pray. Pray for Josh on his journey there and back, to keep him safe. Pray that the time will pass quickly. Pray for his safety while he is working and the safety for his guys. Pray for our hearts to grow fonder and closer together while we are apart. Pray for God to take hold of our lives and do great things in our marriage. And pray for strength- that it will get easier everyday.
As for me, I am going to smile because I can. Because I am so happy to have been so undeservinly blessed in my life. Because I have the greatest man in the world as my husband. Because we have discovered a love that many ppl in there life can never even imagine. And because, no matter what, I trust the Lord and the things that He has planned for us. So, just pray with me and don't worry about me. (If anything, worry for Josh. )
We are going to spend our last weekend together finishing our apartment and just enjoying each other's company. We may even have a few of his guys over for a nice, home cooked meal. :) Who knows? I'm up for anything.
And to Josh - you are my heart, my soul mate, the other part that makes me whole. While you are gone, I will dream about you, and cry for you, and laugh with you, and love you always. You
will be in my heart and on my mind every second of everyday that you are gone. And I will be counting the days until you come back to me. Until then, I will bake for you and send you things that will remind you of me everyday. And I will keep you in my prayers, just like I always do...
But, I don't want anyone to feel sorry for either of us; instead I would ask one thing from you. Pray. Pray for Josh on his journey there and back, to keep him safe. Pray that the time will pass quickly. Pray for his safety while he is working and the safety for his guys. Pray for our hearts to grow fonder and closer together while we are apart. Pray for God to take hold of our lives and do great things in our marriage. And pray for strength- that it will get easier everyday.
As for me, I am going to smile because I can. Because I am so happy to have been so undeservinly blessed in my life. Because I have the greatest man in the world as my husband. Because we have discovered a love that many ppl in there life can never even imagine. And because, no matter what, I trust the Lord and the things that He has planned for us. So, just pray with me and don't worry about me. (If anything, worry for Josh. )
We are going to spend our last weekend together finishing our apartment and just enjoying each other's company. We may even have a few of his guys over for a nice, home cooked meal. :) Who knows? I'm up for anything.
And to Josh - you are my heart, my soul mate, the other part that makes me whole. While you are gone, I will dream about you, and cry for you, and laugh with you, and love you always. You
will be in my heart and on my mind every second of everyday that you are gone. And I will be counting the days until you come back to me. Until then, I will bake for you and send you things that will remind you of me everyday. And I will keep you in my prayers, just like I always do...
be safe, be careful, and above all else, come back to me... I love you... Yours forever, Your Wife, Jess
1 comment:
girlllllllll
that made me cry.
i'm praying for you and josh.
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